Work in the Time of Corona

There's this thing or activity called the flow which is a trancelike and an arguably blissfully ignorant state where fulfillment seems like breadcrumbs that can be acquired every step of the way. Before the pandemic occurred, for the most part I'd like to think that I've been in the flow where I used to spend a lot of late nights being productive, hustling and grinding every night to do tasks and be closer to goals that promise a sense of purpose when accomplished. Once the lockdown began, when the number of cases started spiking and going outside the house became against the law, things went awry.

I used to think that there's not enough hours in a day due to the number of things that I wanted to do in life but when time to think and reflect actually came about, the time I spent working actually diminished. I thought about how, excluding the things outside the scope of our control, anything can be done and it's just a matter of time and effort; however, I can't not bear in mind that we have to have an adequate reason to act otherwise it just naturally doesn’t make sense and is borderline wrong. I stopped to think about whether or not the promised sense of purpose was going to be fulfilled - anxiously pondering upon the point of all this since the world is going down anyway. I may have caught myself in an analysis paralysis type of scenario where I can’t act given that there seems to be insufficient data for a meaningful answer where the reason behind x is y and the reason behind y is z with which the reason behind z cannot be found.

Soon enough, my train of thought stumbled into how the tricky part lies in the definition of the word adequate. Maybe there's just really no answers to the big questions. I theorize that we may just have to put a pause in the potentially wild-goose chase process of infinite questioning and decide that some of our little reasons are enough. Once thinking has reached the point of diminishing marginal returns, maybe it’s just naturally time for action.